Note: Issy Jinarmo is the pen name for Jill Baggett, Narelle Noppert and Maureen Kelly OAM
Birdie had a picturesque view over the sprawling Sydney suburbs from the desk in her brick city unit. Mr Cat awkwardly climbed on her lap as the amber morning sun poured in the window.
“What should I do, Cat?” she mumbled as she lifted her morning coffee to her lips, the air filling with a steamy aroma of freshly ground beans. Wrapping her hands around the warm mug, she eyed Mr Cat, who offered no solution, only nuzzled deeper under her arm.
Her swift fingers darted across her keyboard, stopping occasionally to stroke her warm companion. On the bank web-site she filled in the rectangular blank box; a dollar sign, 4 digits, a dot followed by two zeros. Her long fingers hesitated over the ‘confirm transfer sign’. Deep in thought, Birdie picked up her brush running it through her hair and pulling it together, capturing it into a long pony tail. She readied for work, no closer to the solution she yearned for.
‘He was a good catch’, her friends told her, ‘a gentle and thoughtful young man, how lucky was she’? There was no doubt Nat ticked all the boxes, perhaps except for money management. Birdie had matured, had enough experience with men to know what to look out for, especially after the number of drop kicks she had dated. She recalled watching Judge Judy on telly, warning ‘if they fool you once, shame on them, but if they fool you more times, shame on you’. She considered this philosophy.
Mr Cat warmed her, but gave no response, so the words of Judge Judy filled her thoughts as her mind darted like a court room echoing the ‘fors and againsts’ of Nat’s request to borrow money.
It wasn’t the first time he asked for money in the year they had been an item. She had waited a while to be repaid so doubted the wisdom of loaning more to him.
He had eventually repaid her though so she clicked ‘confirm transfer’ albeit a little reluctantly. Two thousand dollars was more than she could afford and she wondered why he needed such a large amount. The most he’d asked for previously was $500. When she queried why he needed it he’d been evasive, saying he was in a bit of a sticky situation and was embarrassed to tell her more about it in case she branded him an idiot.
“It’s probably me who’s the idiot,” she muttered to Mr Cat as she headed out the door. She enjoyed her job at Woolworths, gradually working her way up and now Manager of the fruit and vegetable section. The recent pay rise that came with the position was welcome too, still, two thousand dollars was putting a strain on the budget.
That evening she waited at the car-park entrance for Nat to pick her up as usual. They’d settled into a comfortable arrangement. He would meet her at 5.30 and they would go for a coffee at one of the numerous al fresco cafes on the way to her unit where she would cook his dinner and they would settle in for an evening of television. She had yet to be invited to his home. When she’d asked where he lived he said, “Nowhere a lady like you would be impressed with. I want to remain your handsome mystery man,” he’d laughed and hugged her and she found her heart melting. He was a charmer. She was naive and had little experience with the ways of the world.
That was about to change. By 6 PM, after sending Nat a text and leaving a message on Voicemail, Birdie’s patience was exhausted. ‘Mmmm,’ she thought, Judge Judy’s words wise words crossing her mind. ‘I can’t even go round to his home and check he is all right because I don’t know where he lives. That’s got to change. I’m not putting up with this behaviour especially now he’s $2,000 richer!’
Birdie walked slowly to her unit praying Nat would be waiting for her. The night air was cool. She pulled her coat close to her body as she walked. Her thoughts returned to the $2,000 she had transferred earlier. ‘Yes,’ she thought, ‘that’s a lot of money and yes, he is a mystery man. Does he take me for a fool?’
Nat was not waiting for her. She was, however, greeted warmly by Mr Cat who wove in and out of her legs as she filled his bowl with his favourite meal, chicken and rice. ‘At least you never let me down,’ she whispered to Mr Cat as he licked his paws and purred contentedly.
She poured herself a glass of chardonnay, sank in her armchair, praying her mobile would ring. Half-an-hour later she tried Nat’s number again. No answer.
She peered through the window into the street below. A few cars passed by; pedestrians hurried along the footpath. ‘I’ve had enough of this,’ she thought. ‘I’ve let my heart rule my head. All I know about him is his mobile phone number. I don’t even know where he works. Now I think about it, he was evasive when I asked him about that too.’
Birdie sat for a while in deep thought then switched on the 7 PM TV news. Not that she was really interested in what was happening in the world, there was enough happening in her own life! At least it would distract her for a little while.
“We’ve just received a report of a serious house fire at Engadine, 33 km south of Sydney. Over to our reporter at the scene…”
Birdie glanced at the TV screen. The footage being shown was that of flames reaching high into the sky from a burning house. “Unfortunately,” said the reporter, “the only survivor of this horror fire is a young girl who is, at present, being comforted by her father who was confronted by this horror scene when he arrived home a few minutes ago.”
Birdie looked closely at the screen. The camera was focused on a young child wrapped in a blanket being hugged by – Nat!
Birdie dropped into the nearest chair, she pushed her hands onto her cheeks. The camera panned closer, as an annoyed witness put his hand up trying to turn the press away. It was definitely Nat, she had no doubt.
“Oh no!” She wailed, realising it would be impossible to get any kind of explanation for some time. “He will have a lot of things to take care of… and… and his child. What have I done trusting a man who it appears has led a double life?”
Birdie cried herself to sleep, not waking till first light the next morning. Mr Cat was annoyed. He hadn’t been fed since the previous morning. He jumped on the bed, nudging her with his nose, his meows getting louder and more urgent.
“Oh Cat,” she cried. “I’m sorry I have neglected you.” She pulled him close to cuddle him but he wasn’t interested. He wanted to be fed. She padded to the kitchen, still wearing the clothes she had gone to work in the previous day, her ponytail a tangled mess, her eyes red and swollen. She looked at the clock.
“I will have to phone work. No way can I face the world today,” she muttered to herself as she stooped to feed Mr Cat.
In the bathroom Birdie washed her face with cold water and looked closely at herself in the mirror. “I can’t let myself get down like this, what am I to do?” As she dabbed her face gently, her mobile rang. It was Nat and, for a minute, she froze.
“Birdie darling, I need to talk to you urgently. I love you, please call me back.” The recorded message played, she listened to it a number of times wondering what he was going to say. She knew she had to face him at some point, get an explanation and work out if she was being strung along.
“Okay, if he rings again I will answer, otherwise I won’t know where I am.”
The clock chimed, reminding her it was 7 am. She turned the radio on in time to hear the news report.
Police have released the name of the woman killed in the house fire at Engadine last evening. She is Mrs Stephanie Morris. A young child in her care has been rescued by neighbours. Police are investigating the cause of the fire… The new Prime Minister returned from his visit overseas this morning……….” Birdie turned the radio off.
“Oh no! That must be his wife and the little girl his daughter.” The shock hit her again.
“I have to know what is going on.” The phone rang, Nat’s face came up on the screen. She knew there was no way of avoiding him. “I’ll just let him speak. Hear what he has to say.” She instructed herself.
“Hello Birdie, it’s Nat. I have so much to tell you. Will you please hear me out?” Before she could reply, he continued.
“I haven’t been honest with you and I need to come clean.” Birdie didn’t respond. “My mother was killed in a house fire last night. I have a little daughter, Louise, luckily she is safe,” he continued.
“That was your mother? I saw the fire on the news.” Birdie replied, feeling guilty she had thought it was his wife, but at the same time relieved it wasn’t!
“My mother has been suffering from dementia. I have been trying to get her into nursing home, that’s why I borrowed the money. I’ve been in a terrible mess, worrying that something may happen to Mum or Louise. I’m lucky Louise is okay but she’s in hospital overnight as a precaution. I need to explain everything to you…to make you understand… I love you… I’ve just been trying to work it all out. Can I call you back please? I have to pick Louise up and we will be staying with friends.” In the background Birdie heard a voice calling ‘Mr Morris’. “I have to go. The doctor wants to speak to me. I’ll call you back. I love you Birdie.”
Birdie had such a mix of emotions. ‘Get yourself together, Girl,’ she admonished herself, ‘what you decide to do in the next two minutes is going to affect the rest of your life.’
The phone rang. She let it ring several times before she made the decision … she picked it up and tried to keep her voice steady as she said, “Hello.”
“Can I come round to see you, Birdie? I don’t want to tell you over the phone.”
“Tell me what?” She tried to sound in control of her emotions but knew she probably wasn’t being very successful.
“A lot. Please …”
“Well, so long as you don’t ask me for money,” she wasn’t going to let him off the hook so easily.
There was a moment’s silence before he answered. “Of course not.”
She hung up feeling guilty she’d been mean when Nat was in a distressed state but she felt she had to make a point. “He might not even come now,” she said to Mr Cat.
“Meow,” he replied. Did she imagine he had a smug look on his face?
Birdie showered and was mildly annoyed with herself when she put Nat’s favourite top on with her jeans. He’d told her she looked sexy in the top! She took extra care of her hair and makeup and looked quizzically at her reflection. “Femme Fatale,” she told the mirror with a laugh. She put the kettle and rang Woolies, telling them something unavoidable had come up and she would have to take leave for the day.
Feeling somewhat pleased with herself she carried her coffee and raisin toast to the couch. The Today Show was on with its usual mix of gossip and ads. She was about to flick through the channels to see if she could find something more relaxing to watch when the News Flash icon lit up the screen. ‘Better just see if it’s anything interesting,’ she murmured to Mr Cat.
Five-year old Louise Morris, the child rescued from the house fire last night in Engadine, has disappeared from her hospital bed. An extensive search of the hospital has failed to locate her. Louise, who has red hair, is probably wearing a hospital gown and may be disorientated. Authorities are urgently requesting the public look out for her as she has been through extensive trauma. Attempts to contact her father, Mr Nat Morris, have been unsuccessful. Anyone knowing his whereabouts is asked to contact triple 0 immediately.
Birdie stared at the TV screen. ‘What have I got myself into?’ she thought. ‘More to the point, where are Nat and his daughter? What should I do?’ Her heart was pounding. ‘I’ll call triple 000,’ she thought, ‘and let them know Nat has been in touch with me. Was that being disloyal? No, of course it wasn’t,’ she reasoned. The police were understanding, recorded her details and requested she call them the minute Nat contacted her.
Birdie ‘surfed’ between TV channels for the remainder of the morning. There were brief updates following the tragic house fire. No reported sightings of Nat or his daughter. Birdie constantly questioned herself regarding her relationship with Nat. Why hadn’t he contacted her as he promised? Was his lack of communication the reason his marriage broke up? Birdie’s worries turned to rage. She was obsessed with locating Nat, leaving six voice mail messages and sending three text messages. The fact he didn’t respond increased her anger. Had the house fire been too much for him? Was his mind unbalanced?
Birdie sat stroking Mr Cat in an attempt to stay calm. The midday news reported the search was continuing for Louise and that her father had not contacted police.
I know that,” Birdie bellowed at the TV screen, “Where are you, Nat? Why don’t you call?”
Suddenly, like an answer to a prayer, her mobile rang. “Hi Birdie,” Nat’s voice was calm which enraged Birdie.
“Why the bloody hell haven’t you answered my calls? The police are looking for you.”
“The police?” Queried Nat. “Okay, but I need to talk to you. Are you at home still?”
“Still, of course I am STILL here.”
“Okay, be with you soon.” The phone line went dead. Birdie burst into tears. Were they tears of anger or relief? She wasn’t sure.
Five minutes later Nat stood at Birdie’s front door holding a small, red-haired girl in his arms.
“Here we are,” Nat said happily. Birdie was speechless. Mr Cat purred. Louise laughed softly.
“Come in,” Birdie shouted, attempting to control her anger.
“What’s wrong?” enquired Nat as he and Louise sat down on the couch alongside Mr Cat.
“According to the TV news update, your daughter is still missing and no one can locate you, her father. Where the hell have you been? Didn’t it occur to you people have been worried about you? Are you so selfish…”
“Whoa a minute, Birdie, what are you saying?”
“I’m telling you the police and the hospital authorities have been worried about you both.”
“What? That’s madness. The doctor checked Louise over and told me we could leave. The nurse said she would fix the paperwork. So, we did just that – we left.”
“Didn’t they give you a discharge form?”
“No, should they have done?”
“Yes, of course. That’s normal procedure and why didn’t you answer one of my many calls?”
“I was ecstatic Louise was all right. I wanted to come here straight away but as Louise was still in her hospital gown we went to Big W to buy some clothes.”
“You just walked out of the hospital with Louise in her hospital gown?”
“Louise was wearing my jacket. Nobody stopped us. Oh God! I’d better let the hospital know we are okay.” Nat gave a deep sight. “It’s been such a traumatic night, Birdie.”
‘How could I be so callous?’ Birdie thought. ‘After all Nat’s been through.’ “I’ll phone triple 0,” she offered picking up her mobile.
Following her call, two police officers were dispatched to Birdie’s unit. Nat was assured Louise’s unorthodox discharge would be investigated by hospital management. In the meantime, as the police had his contact details, he was free to put the wheels in motion for his mother’s funeral, caring for his daughter and, of course, contacting his insurance company about the future of his house.
“Thank you, officers,’ a relieved Nat said. “Louise and I will, hopefully, be living at a friend’s place for the foreseeable future.”
The police officers’ presence gave Birdie the opportunity to mull over her relationship with Nat. Feelings of enormous compassion and love welled up within her as she realised how their relationship had dramatically changed overnight.
The police officers left; Mr Cat and Louise curled up together on the couch and fell asleep.
“I’m so grateful to you, Birdie,” Nat said, putting his arm round her shoulder. She didn’t move away.
“Why didn’t you tell me about Louise?”
“I didn’t know how to, especially when I’d borrowed the money from you.”
“I would have understood.” Tears of sympathy trickled down her cheeks. “Where’s Louise’s mum?”
Nat wiped away Birdie’s tears with a tissue. “She died giving birth to Louise. My mother has helped me bring her up. I should have told you, I’m sorry. I was afraid I would lose you if you knew. I love you so much, Birdie.”
Birdie sobbed loudly. Louise stirred. Mr Cat meowed. “I love you too, Nat, more than words can say. It looks like Louise loves Mr Cat, which is wonderful and I know now I wasn’t foolish falling in love with you.”
“Foolish? Never,” Nat said, nestling Birdie in his arms.
Was that a smug smile Birdie saw on Mr Cat’s face as she kissed Nat tenderly?
DoubleSpeak 